Our sex life changed after I gave birth – my husband isn’t interested


DEAR DEIDRE: IT’S been two years since my husband touched me, and I feel ugly and lonely.

After our daughter’s birth six years ago, he began treating me like a mother, not a lover.


He just isn’t interested in sex and I have given up

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We’ve been married for ten years. I’m now 34 and he’s 40.

Our sex life used to be regular and good but he seemed to stop wanting me after childbirth.

He always made up excuses, such as “our daughter is in the next room”.

I’ve tried to seduce him many times – wearing sexy lingerie, cooking him special meals and so on, but I’ve given up as I hate being rejected.

The thought of being celibate for ever makes me so sad.

I’m losing confidence, even though people tell me I look good and strange men chat me up when I go out.

Yet I love my husband and I’d never cheat on him. How can I make him want me again?

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DEIDRE SAYS: Quite a lot of couples find their sex lives change after childbirth, but there is an issue here if you have no sex at all.

Your husband needs to know how you are feeling, before your relationship implodes.

I always lie to my partner and it results in huge blow-ups
Thea sleeps with Mark the gardener after they grow close

Tell him you love him and want intimacy.

If things don’t improve, try couple counselling. See tavistockrelationships.org (020 7380 1960).


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