Is virtual sex with my girlfriend on Zoom illegal?


DEAR DEIDRE: SINCE my girlfriend moved to university last month, we’ve been having virtual sex several times a week.

But now a friend has told me that’s illegal. Is she right?


To avoid the distance getting in the way, we agreed to have regular dates over Zoom

I’m 19, my girlfriend’s 18 and we’ve been together for two years.

In a bid to avoid the distance getting in the way of our relationship, we agreed to have regular dates over Zoom.

But we often end up having virtual sex.

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Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

I was talking about our routine with my best friend, who is in a similar situation, as her boyfriend has moved two hours away.

She looked horrified and is convinced that what we’re doing is not allowed.

DEIDRE SAYS: As you’re both over 18, so long as neither of you records the other without their consent, then no, you aren’t doing anything illegal.

However, if you were to share your partner’s explicit content without her permission, this would be known as revenge porn, which is against the law.

Many couples sext and have virtual sex but it is important you make sure you are being safe.

The Mix has a great page explaining how (

I’m also sending you my support pack, Staying Safe Online, with other useful tips.

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Try to schedule regular face-to-face meets. Knowing when you’ll next see each other will make things easier.

I’m also sending you my pack, Looking After Your Relationship.


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